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                        Mt. Holz Science Fiction Society
                    Club Notice - 03/09/01 -- Vol. 19, No. 36

       Chair/Librarian: Mark Leeper, 732-817-5619, mleeper@avaya.com
       Factotum: Evelyn Leeper, 732-332-6218, eleeper@lucent.com
       Distinguished Heinlein Apologist: Rob Mitchell, robmitchell@avaya.com
       HO Chair Emeritus: John Jetzt, jetzt@avaya.com
       HO Librarian Emeritus: Nick Sauer, njs@lucent.com
       Back issues at http://www.geocities.com/evelynleeper
       All material copyright by author unless otherwise noted.

       The Science Fiction Association of Bergen County meets on the
       second Saturday of every month in Upper Saddle River; call
       201-447-3652 for details.  The Denver Area Science Fiction
       Association meets 7:30 PM on the third Saturday of every month at
       Southwest State Bank, 1380 S. Federal Blvd.

       ===================================================================

       1. One of the disadvantages of not  having  children  is  that  you
       cheat  yourself  of  having  a second childhood, at least as far as
       entertainment goes.  Well, for small children it would not  do  you
       much  good anyway.  Who wants to watch Barney with their very young
       children?  Not many, I admit.  But when the children start  getting
       older you take them to see the Disney animated films.  And you tell
       people you are just going to  watch  the  kids,  but  after  a  few
       minutes  it  is  "Daddy,  I  wanna go home."  "Sh-sh-sh-sh, Daddy's
       watching the movie.  Wow, look at  that  dragon  the  witch  turned
       into!  That is SO COOL!"

       But not having children Evelyn and I missed all that.  I  think  we
       also  carelessly  passed up having mid-life crises, which we really
       were entitled to even without children.  In my case it was  because
       I  have  always  been  mathematical and knew years in advance about
       when mid-life would likely be.  It did not catch me unawares and so
       we  didn't  suddenly  feel  we  had  to  act like 20-year-olds.  Or
       perhaps we have been acting like 20-year-olds all along (minus  the
       beer  and  the  hang-gliding, of course).  But I do admit that with
       the advent of our getting a DVD player I am sort of revisiting  the
       adventures  of  my teenage hero, James Bond.  I have just completed
       my collection of the first six Bond films with YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE,
       which I just now realize should really be YOU LIVE ONLY TWICE.  But
       that is an example of what has been  happening.   I  expect  to  be
       drawn  into  these films and I can see why I liked them, but I also
       see flaws I missed when I first saw them.

       One of the things I am starting to look at is the song lyrics.   To
       the best of my knowledge nobody really has done an appraisal of the
       songs of the James Bond films.  I  might  as  well  do  it,  albeit
       superficially.   I  used to love the Bond songs.  I would sing them
       to myself when I was mowing the lawn.  Now I look at them  and  see
       how silly they were.

       Take the song from FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE.  (I will take  the  songs
       in order but will skip over DR. NO.  It did not really have a title
       song.  For the title music it used the wordless  James  Bond  theme
       and  a  calypso  version  of "Three Blind Mice.")  The lyric of the
       second Bond film goes:

                 From Russia with love I fly to you,
                 Much wiser since my goodbye to you.
                 I've traveled the world to learn,
                 I must return from Russia with love.

                 I've seen places, faces and smiled for a moment,
                 But oh, you haunted me so.
                 Still my tongue-tied young pride,
                 Would not let my love for you show
                 In case you'd say no.

                 To Russia I flew but there and then,
                 I suddenly knew you'd care again.
                 My running around is through,
                 I fly to you from Russia with love.

       First of all it loses points because it has nothing  whatsoever  to
       do  with  the plot of the film.  This guy singing is no James Bond.
       Barney Fife is a bit closer.  It  is  a  song  written  by  someone
       returning  from  Russia  to  his  former girlfriend.  He has been a
       world traveler but all it has taught him is that he  should  return
       to  his girlfriend.  But it must be returning from the right place.
       It won't work if he is returning from someplace like  dull  Belgium
       or  Denmark.   Warm  countries  are right out.  Apparently his girl
       wants to be returned to from Russia.  Why, we never find out.   Now
       the  plot  thickens.  He has been traveling around since they split
       up, but he keeps remembering her  and  wishing  he  had  been  more
       romantic  with  her.   He really did love her but the fear that she
       would reject him so unhinged his fragile little mind that he  could
       not  speak  up.   This  guy's not ready to cross a street much less
       journey around the world.  Well then he took  a  plane  to  Russia.
       Here  he  is  sightseeing  and  in  the  middle  he has a sartorial
       experience.  Something like, "The Kremlin, onion  domes,  the  snow
       and  ice,  fur  hats, borscht.  Hey wait.  OF COURSE she'll love me
       again."  Now there is an air  of  mystery  added.   Apparently  she
       loved  him at one time and stopped.  Why?  We never know.  But that
       is why he is afraid to say that he loves her in  case  she  rejects
       him  a  second  time after once loving him.  Now this wimp suddenly
       knows that he can make her love him again because he  is  returning
       from  just the right country.  I hope he remembers to bring her one
       of those little nested dolls.

       I mean after I listened to what this guy was really saying  in  his
       love song I find myself shaken and not stirred.

       Well, let's move on to GOLDFINGER.  A piece of this lyric goes

                 Golden words he will pour in your ear,
                 But his lies can't disguise what you fear,
                 For a golden girl knows when he's kissed her,
                 It's the kiss of death from Mister Goldfinger.
                 Pretty girl beware of this heart of gold
                 This heart is cold.

       This song was clearly "written to spec" by someone who had not seen
       the  film.   It  tries  to  be about the character in the film, but
       misses by a mile.  I mean  the  words  describe  Goldfinger  sweet-
       talking  a  lady.  I tell you that Gert Frobe really looks like one
       hell of a lover, doesn't  he?   So  here  he  is  whispering  sweet
       nothings into some lady's ear.  But he isn't fooling her.  Why not?
       Because she has already been painted gold  and  is  dying  of  skin
       suffocation.   At this point no amount of sweet-talking is going to
       win her, no matter how cute Frobe/Goldfinger is.   Well,  leave  us
       face it.  She had to be after his money from the beginning.

       So, those were the title songs from the  early  days  of  the  Bond
       films,  when  they  were  still  deciding  just what to do with the
       character and the series.  They were  creating  the  Bond  formula,
       songs and all.  Next week I will talk about what they did from that
       point on.  [-mrl]

                                          Mark Leeper
                                          HO 1K-644 732-817-5619
                                          mleeper@avaya.com

           Nobody ever really wants a scandal  cleared up. 	   Uncleared it allows the imagination to run wild
	   like a child in a flowerbed.
                                          -- Roger Rosenblatt


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